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From: dweller@dfw.net (David Weller)
Subject: Re: Programmers -> Engineers; Engineers -> Programmers
Date: 1996/08/10
Message-ID: <4uiuna$4ut@dfw.dfw.net>#1/1
X-Deja-AN: 173407094
references: <1996Aug8.115630.4568@relay.nswc.navy.mil>
 <4udri5$dmv@michp1.redstone.army.mil> <320CB7C4.53FE@gnn.com>
organization: DFWNet -- Public Internet Access
newsgroups: comp.lang.ada
Date: 1996-08-10T00:00:00+00:00
List-Id: <comp.lang.ada>


In article <320CB7C4.53FE@gnn.com>, Andy Askey  <ajaskey@gnn.com> wrote:
>Kevin J. Weise wrote:
>background.  Most have a management background which usually allows them
>to screw up everyone and everything involved.
>
>

Which is why Scott Adams is laughing all the way to the bank while we
laugh over his latest book, The Dilbert Principle.  

I created a corrolary to the Dilbert Principle called the Dilbert
Factor, which is a scale based on the percentage of Dilbert cartoons
that apply to your workplace:

	100-90%		Forget about giving two weeks notice.  Leave Now!

	90-80%		Give two weeks notice, but explain you must take 
			vacation for the last two weeks because "The voices 
			told me to clean my entire gun collection"
			Because most managers are direct descendants
			of primates, they will undoubtedly consider
			this a threat and have some sweaty security
			guy escort you out of the building.  At this
			point, tell your manager you don't want to
			take vacation, but you just need to go home
			for an hour.  They will give you the two weeks
			free.  For bonus points, recite bad Vogon poetry
			to the security guard as he's walking you
			out.

	80-70%		You are undoubtedly wondering what to do.  You
			feel like a caged animal.  Don't worry, look
			around.  Did you know that the Slobovian word
			for "animal pen" is "Cubicle"?  If your
			Dilbert Factor is this high, you're probably
			working for an aerospace company, from which
			there is no escape.

	70-60%		This one is tricky, because everybody _thinks_
			this is where they are at.  You could change
			jobs, but if you're still planning on staying
			in your career field, you'll only succeed in
			changing faces, not your Dilbert Factor.  Have
			you considered becoming a televangelist? Also
			remember:  Managerial intelligence, which some
			claim is an oxymoron, is scientifically proven
			to be a constant.  Managerial population,
			sadly, is increasing.  You are doomed to watch
			your Dilbert Factor increase.  Give up.

	60-50%		Rejoice!  Have a donut!  If you're aspiring to
			become a manager, however, now is a good time
			to head up a "Wellness Committee" or "Quality
			Circle".

	50-0%		Stop lying!  You're either working at home as
			an overpriced consultant (in which case, I
			want to know your secret!), or you're already
			a manager saying, "I don't do those things to
			my employees" (of course, the fact that you're
			reading this is probably entirely accidental,
			but that's beside the point...get back to work
			on that "rightsizing" report or you won't get
			this quarter's bonus!)

In retrospect, the scale could probably be bigger, but since I don't
get paid by the word like Scott, and since my third Whiskey and Coke
is sapping my creative juices, I'll just close with this comment: Am I
off-topic?

-- 
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