From mboxrd@z Thu Jan 1 00:00:00 1970 X-Spam-Checker-Version: SpamAssassin 3.4.4 (2020-01-24) on polar.synack.me X-Spam-Level: * X-Spam-Status: No, score=1.4 required=5.0 tests=BAYES_50,INVALID_MSGID autolearn=no autolearn_force=no version=3.4.4 X-Google-Language: ENGLISH,ASCII-7-bit X-Google-Thread: 103376,d66c572bc188e719 X-Google-Attributes: gid103376,public From: Sam Harbaugh Subject: F-16 Update Date: 1996/03/20 Message-ID: <199603201401.JAA09228@bb.iu.net>#1/1 X-Deja-AN: 143387089 sender: Ada programming language x-sender: harbaugh@iu.net comments: Gated by NETNEWS@AUVM.AMERICAN.EDU content-type: text/plain; charset="us-ascii" mime-version: 1.0 newsgroups: comp.lang.ada x-mailer: Windows Eudora Light Version 1.5.2 Date: 1996-03-20T00:00:00+00:00 List-Id: This came from a former Eagle driver and reached me through a circuitous route of AF people. Thought you people working on F-16 software might enjoy :-) ----- In response to the zillions of Lawn Dart ads and posters that brag, "F-16: Air-to-Everything," here is what several Eagle Drivers (including Skull at the Spang) said about it. These captions can be used for the next round of pork barrel propaganda. The following are captions to replace that stale, boring one: The F-16... A Lean, Mean, Flameout Machine. I SHALL RETURN...Well, I might. Takes a licking and...takes a licking. Have you hugged your chute today? This Vehicle Makes Frequent Stops. I came. I saw. I bingo+d. No deposit, no return. We+ve spent so much money on this thing that we can+t afford to admit we were wrong. A triumph of style over substance. The best darn second place fighter in the world. Instead of a CAS [Close Air Support] mod, we+re going to install a roll bar. And now with this LANTIRN thing and our new Block 40+s, we can hit the ground at night, too! Crunch all you want...we+ll make more. We cover the target like a thong bikini. And BINGO is my Name-O. We crash more airplanes before 9-o+clock than most people crash all day. A war record exceeding even the B-1. Last in the taleknt show, but first in the swimsuit competition. Lose a few...lose a few. Feet and knees together, eyes on the horizon... Designated no-hitter. Everything you wanted in a fighter...and less. Optimist: F-16 Pilot who+s worried about dying from cancer. Only Michael Jackson is more manly. Hey, today we didn+t lose a single jet. This is going to hurt me more than it+s going to hurt you. User friendly...if you+ve got three hands. Careful badguys...I+m carrying BOTH bombs today. I+m talkin+ wall-to-wall Mark-82+s, pal. If I carried more weapons, and if I had enough gas, and if I could actually hit the target, and if I had some more REALLY expensive electrons so I could find you, and if My motor didn+t quit, and if My wings didn+t crack, Boy, I+d really teach you a lesson! ------- End of Forwarded Message